“Happiness is not
something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”
Explaining differences in well-being
Today
we are going to look at the things which impact onto our well-being and, most
importantly, we start looking at what we can do to improve our long-term
happiness. Over the last few decades many researchers have been trying to work what makes the difference between people with a high vs low level of well-being:
- As humans we all share
some common basic needs, including the need for food, rest, safety, a sense of
belonging and connection with others, esteem and self-actualisation.1 Another
way of summarizing our needs is to divide them into the three groups: safety, satisfaction and connection.5
Our well-being will be compromised if any of these essential needs are not met. Importantly, it is possible that we
live in circumstances, which objectively appear to fulfill all these needs, but
that we subjectively do not feel
safe, satisfied or connected to others.5 This means that to us it is the subjective well-being which matters.
- Scientists have been
trying to identify specific factors influencing happiness and the degree to
which they impact our lives. These factors are:
1. Genes: Surprisingly, our level of well-being is to a large degree
determined by our genes. It is thought that there is a genetically
predetermined ‘set-point’ or, probably more accurately, a potential range of
long-term happiness for each individual person.2, 3
2. Life circumstances and demographic factors: This category includes
a large number of different aspects including our ethnicity, gender, age,
childhood/upbringing and major life events, country of residence and the type
of society we live in, marital and occupational status, job security, income,
religious affiliation and health. Unsurprisingly, very adverse conditions (e.g.
extreme poverty, war/violence, abusive relationships) can have a major impact on our well-being (as
the essential needs are grossly
compromised), but once a certain sufficient threshold of external conditions is
met, it appears that influence of life circumstances on our happiness can be quite limited.2,3,6 One of the reasons for this, is that humans are
very adaptable and adjust relatively quickly to most situations. This is known as ‘hedonic adaptation’ (sometimes also called ‘hedonic treadmill’).2-4
It is also the reason why our happiness can sometimes be disappointingly short-lived after reaching certain goals (e.g.
gaining an additional qualification, running a marathon, getting a pay rise). Similarly, a new house/job/partner etc. may seem much less attractive after
the first excitement has worn off. However, the relationship between external
factors and well-being is complex3 and we will therefore explore
them separately in a future post.
3. Attitude and intentional activities: This category includes how
we think and what we do, so our beliefs and attitudes, and our behaviour and
interactions with the world. It has been shown that the influence of this
factor on well-being is quite large.2-4 Unsurprisingly, people who rate themselves as having a
high subjective well-being seem to have more positive and optimistic attitudes,
resulting in more constructive behaviour. They also have a more positive
self-view.6 These positive attitudes and behaviours also allow
‘happy’ individuals to interpret their life events and external circumstances in a positive way, even if the events/circumstances are challenging. When we adopt helpful attitudes and behaviours, we not only become more independent from the
effects of hedonic adaptation2 but it also allows us to find the
strength to overcome more difficult life situations.3 This does not mean that you need to change who you
are. In fact is it very important to take your core values and individual
predispositions into account. It just means that you adapt your thinking and
actions where necessary, to support your own long-term well-being.
Of course there is a degree
of interaction between our genes, life circumstances/demographic factors and
our attitudes/intentional activities, and it may not always be possible to
separate them completely.
So what
can we do to improve our well-being?
-
From a practical point of
view, it can be very helpful to differentiate above factors into things you can change and things you cannot change. We obviously cannot
change our genes and some life circumstances (e.g. gender, upbringing, some
illnesses). On other life circumstances we may have at least some influence
(e.g. some health aspects, occupation and income), but the area we have the
largest control over is attitudes and intentional
activities. This means that if we want to increase our well-being, we
should focus our main effort onto this category.2-4
- In the first post we have
introduced the well-being theory.
According to this theory, our well-being is influenced by positive emotions (or
positivity ratio), engagement in life, good relationships with other people, meaning,
and accomplishments.4 Other aspects to consider are our goals and
values, making the right life choices, and learning to experience, consider,
interpret and remember our life events in a helpful way.3,5 All
above factors are to a large degree under our control.
-
As discussed above, the
path to well-being may be very different for each individual person. What may be a fascinating and positive activity for one
person can be completely pointless to another. People have different values and
goals, different tastes/preferences/motivations and energy levels, but also different problems. So which
specific attitudes and intentional
activities enhance our well-being depends to a large degree on our personality traits, character strengths, preferences/values
and life experiences.2,4 As the individual factors are so important,
it is essential that we know ourselves
well enough to understand what we need and what will make us happy in the long
run (self-knowledge).
- To summarise today’s most
important points: Yes, sometimes it may be necessary or at least helpful to change our external life circumstances- this is definitely the case in situations where the external circumstances truly limit our well-being. However, we need to be careful not to confuse the effect of the hedonic adaptation with a true, permanent limitation of well-being, and we need to be careful not to overestimate the increase in well-being that a change in life circumstance will bring us in the long run.
Therefore, if we think that we truly need to change
our external circumstances, we need to do this wisely (we will come back to this in a few weeks). For
a more reliable and sustainable increase in well-being our main
focus should be on using the right attitudes and intentional activities. Which changes in attitude or
behaviour are the right ones for us, depends on individual factors. Sufficient self-knowledge
is crucial to make the right personal choices.
A truly
amazing person- What can we learn from…:6
Stephen Hawking is one of the greatest
minds of modern science. As a theoretical physicist and cosmologist, his work
has focused on the principal laws governing the universe. With 21 years of age,
Stephen was diagnosed with a rare from of Motor Neuron Disease and given a life
expectancy of 2 years. Although the condition has lead to gradual paralysis
over the decades, including loss of the ability to speak, he is still very much
alive and continues to have a keen interest in life (both professionally and
privately), adapting to its challenges and using inventive methods and aids
(such as a speech generating device activated by a cheek muscle).
What
we can learn from Stephen Hawking is that while illness and disability may
limit what you can do and certainly represent a huge challenge, it is still
possible to take an active part in life and take responsibility for our own
well-being and happiness, by using constructive attitudes and behaviour.
Described in his own words: ‘My advice to other disabled people would be,
concentrate on things your disability doesn’t prevent you doing well, and don’t
regret the things it interferes with. Don’t be disabled in spirit as well as
physically.’ I think that this sentence actually applies to all of us: if we
concentrate on the things that we cannot do or cannot have, we debilitate ourselves. Conversely, concentrating on the things we can do and can achieve enhances our well-being.
Easy reads on the topic of what makes us happy:
Hector and the Search for
Happiness by François Lelord: This is a novel about a psychiatrist travelling around the world to discover the secrets
of happiness
The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for
living by The Holiness the Dalai Lama and
Howard C Cutler: This is an interesting book in which the two authors explore factors
influencing happiness, and in how far Tibetan Buddhism can be applied by
individuals trying to increase their happiness.
The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin: This is the account of as
self-experiment, where author Gretchen Rubin is trying to put theory into
action to improve her own life.
...and a great movie:
A comment on last week's post reminded me of a brilliant Pixar movie called Inside Out, which explains the role of emotions for our happiness really well. The film is about a girl who goes through a difficult time when her family relocates to a different part of the country, and how all emotions have their role to play to get her life back into balance. I think it is a film every child/teenager should see, but adults can also learn lots from it!
Preview: As personality and
individual preferences play such a central role in our well-being, we will have
a closer look at these factors next time. You may be surprised about the things you can
discover about yourself!
References and further evidence-based reading:
1. Maslow AH. A theory of human motivation. Psychological
Review. 1943;50(4):370-96.
2. Lyubomirsky S, Sheldon KM, Schkade D. Pursuing
Happiness: The Architecture of Sustainable Change. Review of General
Psychology. 2005;9(2):111-131.
3. Diener E, Biswas-Diener R. Happiness: Unlocking
the Mysteries of Psychological Wealth. Blackwell Publishing; Oxford, UK. 2008
4. Seligman MEP. Flourish: A New Understanding of
Happiness and Well-Being- and How to Achieve Them. Nicholas Brealey Publishing;
London, UK. 2011.
5. Hanson R: Hardwiring Happiness: How to reshape
your brain and your life. Rider Ebury Publishing, Random House, UK. 2013.
6. Lyubomirsky S. Why Are Some People Happier Than Others: The Role of Cognitive and Motivational Processes in Well-being. American Psychologist. 2001;56(3):239-249.
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